fierce grace visits

230

What I notice when amnesia sneaks in and I begin again to claim doer-ship and control over tomorrow, doggedly pushing on, blindly following the ruts of conditioning and posing as supreme controller, is this:

Something happens to bring me back,
and, probably because I’m a gritty goer,
it happens to my body.

(Arm gets rms: can’t scribble or type,
back goes out: can’t stand at easel,
knee explodes: can’t move.)

Something makes me stop, sit, shut-up
and free-fall yet again
into the what-is of this life I call mine.

That ‘something’ is what I know as Grace.
It’s usually fierce.  Definitely not fluffy.

I’ve learned to love it as my most treasured Beloved,
for it returns me to ITself.

~

memo to busy wee-me

166

this pathless path has only three signposts
and they don’t point to any-thing or any-place:

stop

shut up

sink

into the unknowable Knowingness that you already are, that you are, that you are,
that you are

~

sitting in the dawn-blushed sanctuary
sitting on the zafu:  point zero
sitting with the rhythm of Life’s breath
sitting with hum, furnace of the universe
sitting with so, silver singing silence

sitting ’til the sitter is the sitting
and the blushing and the breathing
and the hum-ing and the silence
and there is only Beloved’s Beingness
and wee-me is a thought-galaxy yet to be invented

~

awakening is neither difficult nor easy

146

awakening is neither difficult nor easy

it happens when it’s ready,
and it’s impartial re time or space

something like this appears to happen:

first you STOP
and you stay stopped

then you SIT
and you stay seated

then you SHUT UP
and you stay silent

having stopped, sat down,
and shut up, what next?

(if that’s your question
you haven’t yet shut up)

eventually the stopper
and the sitter and the mute one
disappear

only unknowable Knowingness remains
wideawake and aware
as IT has always been

that’s all

~

stopping the talk, shutting up at last

115

knowing, sentience, awareness

these are words for IT that utterly fail
to define IT
“The word is not the thing,” said Krishnamurti.
“The word is not the no-thing, either,” echoes Emptiness

knowing that includes no
knower
sentience that includes no
perceiver
awareness that includes no
me

knowing that includes no-thing
known
sentience that includes no-thing
sensed
awareness that includes no-thing
experienced

these are concepts dancing around IT
spinning, dyeing, patterning,
weaving, on the loom of
objectification,
mind’s exquisite tapestry

~

stopping the talk, shutting up at last

there’s just this

melting moment

this

pointless and placeless

peace

~

to awaken is to stop

109

to live is to move:
Life surges, pulses, flows, pushes, wanders, creeps
(just observe nature!)

 

to be is to be determined:
being is Life in movement
dancing the dance of destiny
through the corridors of conditioning
(just observe yourself!)

 

to awaken is to stop:
to stay still
to shut up
to stay silent
long enough
to let Life dance a new dance amongst the neurons

~

 

this time there is no escape

[this post is a duplicate of the ‘about’ page]

A small, weary, middle-aged woman sits on a zafu.  She is hobbled by an old injury that will soon require surgery.  She is thousands of miles from her work, her colleagues, her friends and her sangha.  Her brilliant life is reduced to ashes.

She is withdrawn but not sorrowful for she accepts her circumstances, and she deeply loves the two sweet friends – her parents – she has crossed the world to care for in their ancient age.

She has inquired deeply into life’s mysteries and questions.  She has been blessed to be taught and mentored by great spiritual souls.  The zafu is her friend.

She stops, perforce.  She sits.  She stays.  This time there is no escape.

She enters Emptiness.

~ ~ ~

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