In the studio art works are happening. As always, they mirror the ‘processes’ happening in the larger lifescape.
Several works begun in the last 10 years of almost constant travel and packed away unfinished have been brought to completion. They crawled out of their packaging and spoke up.
The midwife was ready. She had no plans, no designs, no goals. She just listened carefully. Felt the pulse, noticed the vital signs … danced the dance that has no known movements or music …
This natural, unschooled way of working unfolds the artisan’s pathless path.
Waking up to wild wideawakeness, like creativity, is radical discontinuity in a default pattern of thinking.
If it’s confusing to family and friends that’s no fault of the awakened, for whom it might be totally disorienting, especially in the early aftermath.
Disorientation might leave one dazed. Yet there’s no confusion present. There’s awareness that both these states have occurred unwilled, and that’s a marvel.
Radical: radius, radiate, revolve, spiral . . .
Consciousness shudders to a halt
takes a 180 degree turn
re-turns to ITself
IT knows IT
Whatever you are drawn to do from a sense of inner compulsion, from a sense that may seem irrational or even foolhardy, is precisely what will take you towards the truth of yourself. It will be your unique version of ‘the finger pointing to the moon.’
The great Life lesson is always the same, always the apperception of what one actually is, via understanding of what one is not.
The events that unfold as you follow the compulsions may turn out to be fortuitous or they may seem to be awful mistakes. Very often regrets are involved. But don’t be fooled: disappointment is the greatest teacher of all.
My passion has always been to create. What creating taught me was that I-as-artist didn’t exist, which sounds devastating for the ego. And it was. But it simultaneously revealed the non-personal truth of the vastness and glory of the life I had, in ignorance, called ‘mine.’
Creativity, if it’s genuine, will always flow from the unknowable and the immeasurable. If I know what I’m doing I’m not engaged in creativity. I’m simply rearranging the known.
Self-inquiry, for she-who scribbles, is pretty straight forward. There’s no agenda involved and conclusions are avoided. I simply sit (or whatever – it happens as often as remembering does) and watch the arising of thoughts. There’s now no inclination to consider that thoughts are ‘mine’ or that they have significance. Nevertheless they ebb and flow, as is their nature, and I’m curious by nature so I watch them like a researcher.
In my ‘thinking’ research, I find two distinct types of ‘knowing’ seem to occur. For ease of reference, and without being esoteric, I’ll call them alpha and omega.
So-called alpha thinking is linear (think alpha-bet/language) with all lines of thought moving out from and returning to me. The lines form ruts with habitual use, ruts of conditioned reflexes. My alpha thinking corresponds with intellect.
Omega ‘knowing’ is different and calling it thinking is inaccurate for it’s beyond language, beyond all that can be conceived. I’ll call it Omega-mind. It’s unconditioned, has no centre, is ubiquitous. It probably corresponds to impersonal intelligence.
When creative learning or action is occurring, omega-mind is in action, and when that learning needs to be recalled and written-up, alpha thinking comes into play.
Alpha thinking’s arena is the past and the future: it’s the inventor of the persona that plays in the field of time.
But omega-mind is always present as the background unknowable knowingness that alpha thinking arises within. There’s no persona involved, and time and space aren’t relevant. I wonder if my omega-mind might correspond to the original-mind of Zen?
seven words attempting to describe one ‘thing’
a thing that can never be an object
so how can IT be described?
and how can IT be found?
impossible – IT’s never been lost!
seven words all amounting to the same no-thing:
the Presence of the absence of ‘me’
in the absence of the ‘seeker’ the sought is ubiquitous
in the absence of a ‘thinker’ no happiness, no suffering
in the absence of the ‘artist’ creation creates, naturally
in the absence of the above notions,
sweet and solitary,
everythingness abides –
unaccountable and unattainable